Welcome to Juanzzz World...: September 2006

The Angel Wears Panda

Do you still remember when you were in Pri 1, your school shoes were those 'cloth' materials with a rubber strap in the middle.

Looks familiar? Visualise the angelic faces wearing these shoes running around the school garden playing zero-point, hop-scotch, hide-and-seek. That's what I did in the past. In the past, we wouldn't think or know what is branding. We only know we need to wear clean, white shoes to school and that's it ~ simple!

Do you realize that people like to go back to originality after some time? We always hear 'I wish to retire in Australia, New Zealand next time', 'I don't need to have abalone, sharks' fins, I just want a simple life and even plain porrige is tasty'.

Do you realize that you can smile unconsciously naturally at little babies, children? This is because you know they are harmless and pure. And that's why cute. Their actions are the most original.

Do you realize that old folks are like little kids? They need attention, care and coaxing haha. They may need constant care if they are not as feeble.

Life is amazing..

.. from nothing to small to medium to big then burst..!

We are gg round in circle, circling.....circling......circling....

And I still like Aldo, Burberry, Coach, Tiffany, Rolex... But I know I miss Panda..

The Meaning of Life

My colleague wanted me to touch on this topic in my blog. I am beginning to see a trend in the topics favored by readers. It seems like people are DISTRESSED because they are hungry to find the meaning of life, purposes or happiness. Frankly speaking, no matter how I write or what I write is not going to help you to a very large extent. It can only inspire you for a moment. So in that spur of the moment, you may feel 'Oh yes! Right! The write is SUD! I'm gonna be just that!' Unfortunately, this dies down faster than the wind blowing off a candle flame. Because what people told you is not internalised in you.

To find out the meaning of your own life, first thing first, you need to find a quiet place to sort out your thoughts. Other people's definition of 'Meaningful Life' is different from yours. The reason why you are searching for meaning is because at present, your mind is in a whirlwind. For a moment, you want to settle down, for the next, you realise your bf is not The One, then the next, you find that no guys can ever replace your bf. This inner struggle of thoughts left you in confusion. And when you are in confusion, many silly ideas invade into your brain easily. You will keep saying 'Aiya, Bu Zi Dao La, Aiya dunno la'.

Acually you know the answer, but it is just that this solution is not PERFECT. Maybe you love this guy, but he does not shower you with love like you did for him. You are confused, you are filled with self-doubts. But what is the root of the problem? Lack of communication. Perhaps you can sit down and ask him "Is there anythg wrong with our r/s?" Tell him your doubts and confusion. Meanwhile, hear him out too. Perhaps what you did for him is suffocating him. You feel this is good for him but does he feel likewise too?

Actually I realise I may be a joke in the eyes of God. I am not a love expert as I don't have a lot of experiences. I am only an 'amatuer'. And whenever my friends met with serious relationship problems, they ask me. I am neither a person with ample life experiences, I am only a 25-year old girl with some sense and sensibility, not like some old grannies with wrinkles that can form the map of the world. And whenever my friends met with setbacks in life, they ask me what to do. I don't think what runs through my mind is in anyway superior to theirs. They are not morons, surely they must have thought of what I think too. So I realize that all my friends need is a listening ear, and some advices to ascertain their thoughts and decisions. Or rather, have a friend 'inside' their problem so they won't feel alone.

Sometimes I was thinking, I can't even take care of myself and yet I am counselling and advising others on their circumstances. This is indeed a mockery. I am like half a bucket of shit hanging in the mid air, alright?! I may write until so steady, like an expert but I am also LUAN in my life. So I tell you to write, read and say is very easy. Who doesn't know what the protocol of life is?

I seriously do not know what is the meaning of life. I just know that I want to be happy. So I want to do all the things in the world that will make me happy. I want to stay around the people who make me happy. I want to have a positive mind that will make me happy. I want to laugh and joke to make myself happy. I want to sing to make myself happy. I want to be healthy to make myself happy. I want to pray to make myself happy. I want the people around me to be happy so I will be happy.

The Power of Words

There was once a boy who was most detested by his mother, as she felt he resembled his father who was in jail. His father had been a drug addict all his life and had brought much shame and misery to the family. Due to the family background, the boy had neither a happy nor a caring family, and of course was rebellious. And as he was rebellious, his mother would of course scold and beat him more. She would often went:"You are a good-for-nothing, you follow your father's footsteps just like a drug addict, you are better off dead." True enough, the boy became a drug addict.

A voluntory pastor at the jail took care of this boy's case. The pastor realised that this boy had been exposed to all the misdeeds of a gangster. Housebreaking, vandalising, pimping, debts collecting, etc. But the boy did neither of those. He only touched drugs.

As young as the age of three, this boy had been exposed to the words 'drug, heroine, marijuana, glue sniffing' by his mother. He grew up with these words in his mind. He was sure familiar with all these words. "Don't you think that when he grew up, he would want to satisfy his curiousity?" To put it boldly, his mother was the one who had exposed him to drugs. His mother was the one who was reponsible for his upbringing and shaped his actions.

When a baby is born, he is as clean and pure as a sheet of white paper. He is innocent. He follows what the adults around him are doing. He learns by observing and looking first. As he grows older, he learns by listening. As he is young, he does not know what is right or wrong. He needs education, teaching, role models and guidance.

I seriously feel that a person is born kind, harmless and innocent. I despise parents who neglect children and then blame them for turning astray. If parents can't take care of children, don't even give birth in the first place. Don't bring harm to the kids.

A lot of professors have stressed that we must ecourage every little bit of a child's simple achievements as they grow up, like their first step, their first letter spoken etc, to boost their confidence, to make them feel loved. They need adults' attention! This is very true. Show your love to them openly by positive words. Encourage them by positive words. Words shape minds, which consequently shape actions. Once they have positive minds, they will have positive actions - the right actions to do the right things!

Do you miss Singapore?

These pics were taken from the highest level of SwissHotel. I specially purposely posted them up for a friend who shld be missing Singapore terribly... I presumed. Coz I am missing her too.

You can see the place where we always go shopping after br. Remember we can shop like Tai-Tai. Remember shoes...? bags...? dresses..? We said we need to go hm early for dinner but in the end we shopped til 7 or 8..Then after that took cab hm?

We always hanged out for coffee. You like coffee, you don't like beer. You will always suggest la kopi, you won't suggest dinner coz you don't eat at all! You are ever so sweet a ger. You don't like to hang out at night spots, you always want to go home early. You don't drink uncontrollably like the rest.

Heard you receive spring onions rather than flowers as gifts nowadays. It's alright coz better than nthg hahahahahahhaha this is hilarious! And you frequent markets more than anywhere else. But I'm sure you are still happy as ever if not happier. And you are definitely not missing out anythg exciting here as well, other than me :P

Job VS Career

It's very easy to find a job. You can work comfortably, without worries as OL, being S.Y.T and let life passes. There's no wrong as it is your choice, your liking. You can also work aimlessly as a support staff, supporting everybody but in the end achieving nothing for yourself.

You try to visualise yourself driving on a straight road.. the road is smooth, the cool breeze brushes through your hair, there are no humps or barriers, you don't have to move your steering wheel even. Everyone likes this feeling right? But you don't know how long more you can drive like this because you can't see the end of the road. But you like it because it is an easy task to drive like this. Bring it back to real life, this is what I consider a 'Job'.

Some people may get tired of this drive because it is boring, without any challenges. In fact, many want to get out of this car, but they are too comfortable to move an inch. Imagine not having to scratch your head to think of which route to turn, and just sit in and move on the road. This is what I consider a 'Comfort Zone'.

You are seeing the same old scenaries throughout the journey, everythg is so familiar and expected already then you can even close your eyes and just let the car move on. And everythg is peaceful, cool and smooth-riding. You may not even realise that you can't take abruptness and impromptu situations anymore. You are not customised to even think about the possibility of a stalled engine or a car coming from the opposite direction. This is what I consider 'A Stick-In-The-Mud'.

But let's say in the beginning you chose not to drive on this road. You decided to drive up the mountain because you want to view down from the peak. Spiraling up the mountain is definitely bumpy because mountains are natural and not meant -'unkempt'. Stones and rocks are everywhere. But as you move up one level, you begin to see a larger view and you will feel the effort is all worth it. There is a goal, a purpose, an objective - which is the peak. You know your destination. You are 'climbing up' a ladder whereby there is an ultimatum. You are building up distant by distant, and the obstacles you experience along the way mould your perception, thinking and action when you are at the top. This is what I consider a 'Career'. Every level poses new challenges for you. You do not know what is installed there. You do not know what you will meet along the drive. But you are all prepared to meet them because you have expected them.

Our AGM

Have to bring this up in my blog coz of its significance, being one-in-a-yr kinda function. Our 'Annual General Meeting' was held at Bugis Junction, Liang Seah Street, Xian De Lai Steamboat. It was a very successful function as I was the organizer. I had demanded 100% attendance, and I made it happened. The grp consists of JAS, OOI, YU, YL, SOR and ME! ~~ The Magnificence! We were SIM's noisiest, most talkative, playful grp in the whole class. Once we were even ostracized in class because no one dared to sit near us for fear of being 'dragged' into scoldings by the lecturer. BUT WHO CARES MANZ! Anyway, student life was sure the best phase in my life.

The place was like a fish market, with the rowdy people shouting in their conversations. I almost suffocated with irritation. Sor was definitely pissed!There's one very funny incident. I was eating my favourite quail egg and it was a 'Chou ji dan!' and I immediately spit out. SOR also suay suay eating a quail egg also ROTTEN! Then she innocently asked if she could spit on the table, but was refused by all of us coz we made a big hoo har said it was very disgusting! (They didn't know I spit already). Then POOR SOR actually swollowed the CHOU JI DAN! My god! OH MY GOD! leh coz it really smells! WE WERE IN TOTAL SHOCK! What's new for SOR?! haha

As usual, we gorged ourselves with food. We can say "Wah very full, very full, bursting!" But still swallowing food down our throats simultaneously. The conversation topic was just like what we had been talking in school days. So we were literally laughing at the same old jokes 1,000 times already. The feeling is still the same, no awakwardness though we only meet once a year aka AGM. Yah but exclude Jas and Ooi lah coz they are always within my sight. The day ended with SOR having a terrible diarreoh all of a sudden, and demanded instanteneous out of the cafe, right into the cab, and straight to home! We can't touch her also coz she's afraid she can't control. hahahahhaha Whilst OOI and YL continued with their conversations.....

So the moral of this post is "As you age, the chances of you talking about the past increase!" SHIT!

Do you enjoy Viking?

Do you enjoy the pirate boat when you go to theme parks? Do you like the feeling of going up right to the top and thereafter coming down again, and repeat this motion over and over? Do you know there is this job in Singapore which is totally similar to the motion of a pirate boat?

Every month is like a new trip to sit on the pirate boat. You are refreshed, you wana enjoy yourself as you are on a 'playing ground'. Then the technician will start the machine when everyone is on board. In the beginning, the motion is slow and everyone is in anticipation coz a new trip is always a fresh start. Then the boat slowly moves up first, you like this feeling. Isn't it? (Think about filling up the green application form :P) Again, the boat will move down, this feeling makes you hysterical. Gradually, the boat moves faster and faster, you begin to fill up the white application form with 4 zeros or even 5 zeros, and you get higher and higher. You are over the moon, elated, estatic, overjoyed....!! But then you have to come down again, and this is the part whereby you are nearly traumatised. You wish the boat stops at this moment and lets you get off almost immediately. But almost instantaneously again you are up there, you wish the second hand in the clock will stop at this very moment. The world exists just for you and you are on top of the world.....

Does this job seem familiar? Why do people still hold on to this job? My friend told me that a person like this will go MAD one day.

So how?

I am so SUD!

Immediately after I posted the previous post, I receive an e-card from a friend. Soooooooo Sweet..................Show you all k! kekekeke :P

She says I am an angel leh....coz I am her angelic friend! See already, float in the air hahaahha and also got this meaningful quote:

"Friendship without self interest is one of the rare and beautiful things in life" ~ meaningful quote

So SUD!

Number of Friends ..

I was having a gathering with my poly pals one day and we were trying to count the number of close friends that we have now, and not surprisingly it is countable with 2 hands haha As we age, it is a fact that our close friends will become lesser and lesser. You can give it a try now and start counting! However, first thing first, we must define what do we mean by close friends. My colleague, Jane, defines it as a person whom you meet at least once a week. But I feel this is too vague a definition, because qty of meetups cannot define a relationship, only the quality of it can! So, she gives this: BOND! which I totally agree:) Bond is a feeling, you know it when you are with this person. You can feel the closeness and comfort. So, it doesn't matter even if you meet this person once every two weeks.

That time when I counted, I have about 12 close friends but today when I count using this definition, I only have about 10! 1..J..2..S..3..C..4..I..5..S..6..M..7..L..8..G..9..J..10..S.. Let 10 be my baseline pls.. or running out soon.

Then Jane also asked me, do I have an extremely close friend whom I shared almost everythg, gd or bad, malu or proud thg. Luckily I have 2. Phew! Or I'll be quite a loser leh.

I feel so blessed with all these people in my life. They really make my day whenever I'm moody or down and out. If not for them, I wouldn't be what I am today! Sometimes you do not know that an extremely insignificant matter or person in your life is actually shaping you and consequently your life! Do you realise that a staunch tree is made up of many strong branches and thick bushes of leaves?

Do you know that there's limited time and resources for a person to learn all the lessons in life being gd or bad? But if this person has got good and valuable friends in her life, her life will be enriched better and faster?

BUT

Do you realise that a small microscopic bacteria invading your body may cause you your life? Do you realise that a drop of ink mars a painting? The number of friends doesn't matter anymore, the quality counts.

KTV Session 2nd Sep 2006

It's them again! Bo bien, not many friends in my life so will keep on seeing these two gers! Very sorry, I know it's hard on viewers to look at them...sorry...

Ooi Ooi lor, her hair is nice though..

Jas lor.. very lo sor ger, grouchy and naggy..

Act cute..

Our faces are well-known as pancake plus watermelon..:P

SUD hor my pics..stay tuned..more to come :)

East Side Celebration after Grad - 10 Jun 2005

Half of the colleagues in this pics are gone..and one becomes a mummy now..

My nice colleagues..

No Caption.

I think Genie has slimmed down keke or coz hair is longer huh??

Gary and me - he really looks weird in pics

Scandal...PAPARAZZI!!!

Scandalous!!

Dating back to 10 June 2005 - PICS!!

Yes, I have some more pics here stolen from another colleague's blog haha so I can fill up mine with colours :) We are graudates! Can we have training forever haha??